šŸ”’ SUS Shield achieved 100% threat mitigation for the 847th consecutive day. View security report
All Systems Operational

System Status

Real-time service health. Updated suspiciously often.

99.97% Overall Uptime
23ms Avg Response
0 Active Incidents
47 Services Monitored

Core Infrastructure

SUS Compute Primary compute fabric
99.99%
Operational
SUS Storage Distributed object storage
99.999%
Operational
SUS Database Managed database clusters
99.98%
Operational
Quantum Flux Capacitor Array Temporal data synchronization
101%
Suspicious

Networking

SUS CDN Global content delivery
99.95%
Operational
SUS Load Balancer Traffic distribution
99.97%
Operational
Inverse Packet Disambiguator Bidirectional entropy routing
~100%
Probably
SUS DNS Managed DNS resolution
100%
Operational

Security Services

SUS Shield DDoS mitigation & WAF
99.99%
Operational
SUS Secrets Secrets management
99.999%
Operational
Prefabulated Amulite Encryptor Malleable logarithmic casing
99.99%
Operational
Reciprocating Dingle Arm Reduces sinusoidal depleneration
āˆž%
Transcendent

Data Services

SUS Analytics Real-time data processing
99.94%
Operational
SUS Search Full-text search engine
99.96%
Operational
Modial Interaction Magneto-reluctance Spurving bearing harmonics
99.87%
Operational
SUS Queue Message queue service
99.98%
Operational
Hydrocoptic Marzlevane Prevents side fumbling
97%
Degraded

Developer Tools

SUS Functions Serverless compute
99.95%
Operational
SUS API Gateway API management
99.99%
Operational
SUS CI/CD Build and deployment pipelines
99.91%
Operational
Drawn Reciprocation Dingle Arm Panendermic semi-boloid stator slots
???%
Unknown

90-Day Uptime History

Each bar represents one day. Green is good. This graph is suspiciously green.

Operational Degraded Outage Suspicious

Recent Incidents

Resolved January 15, 2026

Brief Quantum Flux Desynchronization

The Quantum Flux Capacitor Array briefly achieved 103% uptime, causing temporal paradoxes. Resolved by recalibrating the inverse tachyon emitters. No customer impact.

Resolved December 3, 2025

Hydrocoptic Marzlevane Side Fumbling

Detected minor side fumbling in the hydrocoptic marzlevane. The drawn reciprocation dingle arm was adjusted. Service restored before anyone noticed.

Resolved November 22, 2025

Planned Maintenance: Prefabulated Amulite Rotation

Scheduled rotation of prefabulated amulite crystals in the encryptor. Completed ahead of schedule. This was suspicious.

Resolved October 8, 2025

SUS CDN: Elevated Latency in Antarctica Region

Our Antarctica edge node experienced 47ms additional latency due to penguin interference. Penguins relocated. Normal operations resumed.